1. When a ship sinks, women (and children) get off first. 

 2. A woman can hug her best friend without

    worrying she'll think she's gay. 
 

 3. Women can talk to attractive members of the

    opposite sex without having to picture them naked. 
 

4. A woman can never be blamed if it's wet

    on the floor around the toilet bowl.
 

5. If a woman cheats on her spouse everyone will assume

    it's because she was being emotionally neglected. 
 

6. Women are capable of doing at least two different things

    to a passable standard at the same time. 
 

7. Women live longer than men. 

8. Women know how to cover up spots and

    other facial blemishes. 

 9. If a woman inexplicably disappears for two weeks,

    one of her friends will notice. 

 10.Women mature earlier than men

    (some men never mature at all). 

 11. There are times when chocolate is really

     the answer to all woman's problems. 
 

12. Women don't feel uncomfortable with gay

     waiters or hairdressers. 
 

13. A woman can fully assess a person just

      by looking at their shoes. 
 

14. Women know the truth about whether size matters... 
 

 15. A woman can take a drive without trying

     to beat her best time. 
  

16. If a woman forgets to shave, no-one has to know. 
 

17. Women are capable of going longer than

      five minutes without thinking about either sex or football. 
 

18. Women never lust after a cartoon character

      or the central figure in a computer game. 
 

 19. Women can be groupies.

      Male groupies are stalkers. 
 

20. Women can cry and get off a speeding ticket. 
 

 21. A woman can get a whole new lease on life

     just by changing her lipstick.  

 22. A woman can congratulate her team-mate

     without ever touching her rear. 
 

23. Women don't have to worry about catching

      anything important in their zipper. 
  

24. If a woman says something stupid,

     most men will just think she's cute. 
 

25. Women can admit to others when they've

     made a mistake.
 

26. If a woman cries, she's sensitive;

      if a man cries, he's a wimp. 
27. Women know who their children are

      without having a DNA test. 
 

28. It's cool to be a daddy's girl.

     It's sad to be a mommy's boy. 
   

29. Women can wear platforms - which is why

      there is no such thing as a short woman's complex. 
 

30. Women can watch one TV channel at a time

      without getting bored. 
  

 31. Women have total control over their eyebrows. 
  

32. Women can get drunk quicker and

      cheaper than men. 
  

33. A woman's friend won't try to persuade her

     to get a tattoo while she's drunk. 
   

34. A woman won't drive to Hell and back before

     she asks for directions. 
  

 35.Women aren't covered with hair like shag carpeting. 

 36. Woman don't feel threatened if their partner

      earns more than they do. 
 

37. For women, a new season means a whole new wardrobe. 
 

38. Women know exactly what buttons to push to get  what     they want.                                                                                                                                                                   

39. Women don't think reading the manual is a

   betrayal of all  their species stands for.